Life, Loss, and Lengthy Posts

April.  Has it really been since April when I last post?  A lot has been happening.  I needed a blogging break.  Among other breaks.  Blogging was one thing I could actually break from - whereas - the rest I wasn't able to.

It's been a hard several months.  In April, I lost my mother-in-law to Small Cell Lung Cancer.  It was an awful 3 year battle or so.  After the first year, they did preventative so it wouldn't spread to her brain.  Because of that preventative treatment it fast-forwarded Alzheimer-like symptoms.  Cancer Sucks.  I've said it before and I will say it again.

In May, we also lost Charlie.  He was about 19 years old and for those of you who I've known for a while - knew he was feral since the time he was a baby and was a rescue.  He battled strange issues throughout the years and we had always dealt with them.  The last couple of years he was deaf, too.  In the past year, we had watched him get smaller and smaller and he got to the point where many things he once loved were difficult for him.  Things just started shutting down and the vet assumed there was cancer somewhere but didn't want to put him thru all the tests and anxiety.  For the first time since I was 3 years old I'm without a cat in the house.  It's strange.  Our fur family is the smallest it's been in a long time.  Riley and Cricket are still around but we have been having problems with Riley and his natural aging process, too.  He's about 18 or 19 years old now, too!

In June, we found out the company we work for had been sold.  We've been dealing with the change ever since.  It's mostly been good with more changes on the way but it's been a non-stop world-wind of things happening one after another.

Also in June, my mother found out that the sore on her face near her eye was skin cancer.  From what we can gather, everything should be ok, but we had to wait over 3 months for her to be seen again.

With everything going on, I have been unsuccessfully trying to deal with my own stress.  My chronic pain issues seem to come and go like they have in the past BUT now I am dealing with a few other issues I haven't dealt with before.  One being a scalp issue.  I have been trying to treat it with coconut oil, apple cider vinegar, tea tree oil, etc.  Just when I think I am making some progress it comes back with a vengeance.  I'm pretty sure it's some kind of psoriasis or eczema of some sort.

I try and keep this blog positive and happy and try and learn things and archive them but it's been so hard with this post not seeming to do any of those things.  I have been doing a TON of volunteer work and between that and seeing my niece when I can those seem to be the only two things keeping me somewhat sane.

I chopped off all my hair.  It's time for me to do it again.  I've gained weight again and need to shed about 20 pounds.  I think I would feel better if I did.  Winter is coming and that is when I struggle even more with not being as active and on-the-go.

I have a lot of things to blog about but am afraid I just don't have the time.  Because of Riley aging and reverting back to his separation anxiety years I'm not able to sleep in bed anymore.  I have to sleep down in the recliner so he won't bark.  Sleep has been few and far between because of it.  I know it's taking a toll.

I'm trying to start my days earlier so I will have some time for myself but then I just start jumping into work and not doing the non-work things I need to be doing.

I need to re-work my time.  I need to start listening to podcasts.  I need to shake the negative and focus on the positive.  I need to spend less time with the people and things that make me feel bad and start realizing I'm not that bad of a person.  That's been hard for me my entire life.  Certainly something I need to work on.

I have a lot of photos over the last several months I need to post and blog about here.  Many of them have to do with volunteering and new vegan finds but I'm also trying to take more photos of my surroundings and BREATHE.  I won't share those in this post but I hope to in near-future posts.  I just wanted to update you on where I have been and why I haven't been posting.  I need to start posting again...I think it will help me in the long run.  Thanks for NOT giving up on me.

Boring You With The Details...

Before I start rambling about random crap that has been happening the last couple months I thought I would share with you something that I FINALLY found LOCALLY!  YAY!  I have tried a few of the other flavors but this is a first for me with THIS Sparkling Live Drinking Vinegars.  THIS flavor I am speaking/writing of is the TART CHERRY Apple Cider Vinegar with Coconut Vinegar.  I had a thought that I would enjoy it but I have to say I really LOVE it (way more than even I thought I would). 

It had to be a treat because it was still priced at a bit over $3 for the ONE bottle.  I figure some people throw money at cigarettes and other awful things so what if I splurge on this little gem, eh!?

Anyhow...on to a few other things.  I have mentioned (but haven't expanded on) how the last several months I have had a LOT going on.  And even now...I don't know where to begin.  I don't want to lay out all my dirty laundry or anything but I figured I would list a few things that have been on my mind as of late.

My MIL was diagnosed with cancer almost a year ago.  She went thru the treatments wonderfully and is now cancer-free but she's been having other issues since about June that no one can fully explain.  As you can imagine this is something that we worry about day-in and day-out.  It's on-going. 

Several months ago the company I work for was supposed to be sold.  We were looking forward to several changes.  In the final moments of the sale, it fell thru which was a bummer.  It's been doubly difficult because my MIL has worked at the same place for over 40 years and because of the health-related concerns she has retired and we haven't hired anyone new.

Of course, I am giving you the shortened versions of these stories but I have had some people ask me about different things and wanted to update my buddies without sharing TOO MUCH information - if you know what I mean.

DH is on the fair board and exec board of our county fair and that has come in to play more this year than in past years.  I have gotten more involved as well.  In addition, I have been very involved with our League of Women Voters and other community events and committees. 

The beginning of December will be our last time selling for Wildtree.  We've been reps for 9 years and LOVED it but several things have told us it's time to move on.

One of those things is the birth of my niece Trinity.  With everything else going on I want to make sure I spend as much time with her as possible.  My sister lives about 45 minutes from where I do and with both of us working full time it's already hard enough to see her each week (or two or three) even if it's only for a few moments.  This will be her first Christmas and I'm already trying to figure out what we are going to do for her.  I want to start traditions with her...that only her and I will have.  One of the things is UNICORNS.  As many of you know I have collected unicorns my whole life and someday Trinity will be getting all of them whether her mother likes it or not!  hahaha!  I was thinking about giving her a Unicorn from my collection each year but even if I did that for all of her first 18 years that would only be 18 unicorns and I have over 700!  So I don't know if I will give her one this year, 2 next year, 3 the following year, and so on or what but she will start getting them THIS CHRISTMAS!

I'm really trying to get back into cooking more and blogging about it more but I have had some pretty frumpy attempts as of late.  I hope to turn that around soon.

My parents seemed to be excited about their new camper.  We hope to transport it back sometimes this week so it's closer to them for when spring comes around.  I feel bad that they will have to wait months before using it.  But it's something to look forward to and possibly something we can think about for holiday gift giving, too!

This winter I really have to work on many areas of our house.  I just have no idea where to start.  It's quite overwhelming. 

Speaking of overwhelming, these last 6 to 8 months have been just that.  With all of the stuff I mentioned in this post - among other things - not to mention the ongoing vet issues with all 4 furkids - it's been rough to say the least.

Thank you for those who sent me messages and thoughts/prayers.  I let the stress get to me more than a few times but I'm hoping on moving forward and improving the ways I deal with stress from here on out.  It's an ongoing journey so any and all encouragement is appreciated.

Where Did The Week Go?

Thursday, already?  Not sure where the rest of the week went but I knew I needed to get a blog post on before the craziness of the next few days takes place!  You see - my sisters baby shower is Saturday!  Both near-future grandma's are running around like maniacs and then there is the near-future 'Crazy Aunt' (that's ME) that has been overly busy at work and down and out not feeling well for a few days last week!  I haven't been as much help as I wanted the last couple of weeks!  Anyhow...today I will share with you some things I have been taking snapshots of over the past week and then I will blab about the shower next week!

First up is what I had for dinner last night.  It's the first photo you see in this post and it is LITERALLY something I threw together because I didn't want to fuss with anything special.  I found tortilla boats that happen to be vegan and I filled them with this chickpea mixture!

Smoked Russian Chickpeas:

1 Can of Chickpeas

4 T Vegan Mayo (I used Trader Joe's - see below)

2 to 3 T Ketchup

1/2 t Smoked Paprika

1/2 t Wildtree Memphis Dry Rub

3 Drops Organic Liquid Smoke

I cannot express how AWESOME this turned out!  I'm not going to lie - I kinda wanted to drink the 'dressing' which was a more smoked up version of my Vegan Russian Dressing I have done in the past.

This was the Vegan Spread and Dressing I used that I found at Trader Joe's the last time I went.  I'm partial to Just Mayo but this is pretty awesome on it's own.  It's not what I would call a straight-up vegan mayo but more like a dressing like it states - it seemed thicker and did have a different taste but the taste was pretty wonderful!

Another wrap I did within the last week was this one.  It doesn't look like much but it was a great comfort food!  I used a couple of potato patties, tomato slices, and vegan cheese sauce.  The vegan cheese sauce was the leftover vegan cheese powder I made not too long ago!  It worked well!

I had a huge salad this week, too, and I made this dressing.  It was supposed to resemble a vegan Ranch Dressing using Sunflower Seeds as the base but it totally missed the mark as a Vegan Ranch Dressing taste-alike.  The taste wasn't bad it just wasn't what I was going for.  

I'm grateful on a daily basis that Paco has been doing well the last several months!  A few months ago he wasn't able to do this!  He would barely move let alone look engaged in things!  

I still have to help him up on the sofa and recliner but the WANT and INTEREST is there!  I put him up on the recliner but he managed to get on the armrest all by himself and pose like this!  I couldn't tell you the last time he did that!  For about a year I freaked out when he did try to because his legs were so unstable!  How can these photos NOT put a smile on your face?

Future Rooftop Garden

4 of us at work are going to try and do a Rooftop Garden this year! 

A co-worker and I went to an Indoor Gardening Class last night thru Jamestown Community College Warren Campus and the Penn State Ag Extension.  It was fun and VERY informative.  Much of the Indoor stuff we probably won't be doing especially when it comes to lighting, etc...but we walked away with many more ideas for the project we have planned!  I'm VERY excited about this actually! 

We will also be trying to re-use and re-purpose old equipment as much as possible - since there is so much of it around our building.

One of the main places we have decided to 'shop' for our seeds is Seed Saver Exchange.  So far...here is what we have planned from this catalog...Bill - one of our part timers was interested in A & C pickling Cucumbers.  My Mother-In-Law who is also our office manger wanted Stupice Tomatoes.  Casey who is one of our Sales People checked off Joe's Long Cayenne, Hot Portugal, Tolli's Sweet Italian, and Georgia Flame Hot Peppers.  Sam - who is our production person would like to do Amish Snap Peas, Green Arrow Peas, and Cherry Roma Tomatoes.  Then there is me...I'm interested in...Dragon Carrots, Watermelon Radishes, Alma Paprika, Mini Chocolate Bell, and Sheepnose Pimento Peppers, as well as Black Cherry, Blondkopechen, Isis Candy Cherry, Lemon Drop, Tasty Evergreen, and Ukrainian Purple Tomatoes.

Karen, Sam, and Casey have had garden's before and I know that Karen and Sam are very good at Gardening.  Casey said he would provide most if not all of the dirt, and Bill will help us out when ever he can, too!

This is just a Pre-Post of sorts to tell you what we are up to but I will be posting more pics very soon!

The Reason I've Been 'Few & Far Between"

The main reason I have been 'few and far between with my posts lately is because last week our company and our community lost someone very special.  He lost his battle with cancer after a dozen years or more.  He was a fighter, that is for sure!  He's been with the company I work for since 1975-1976.  He was very active in the community and the boards and organization such as Salvation Army, Chamber, Kiwanis, etc.  He was a huge part of his church...a Sunday School Teacher, Youth Mentor, and much more!  He was married for 9 years to his darling of a wife.  He has two grown sons, two grown stepdaughters, and 3 grandchildren.  He was like a father to my husband.  He was a friend.  He was extremely social, funny, witty, helpful, brave, and compassionate.  Work was very strange last week.  I'm glad he's at peace but still very sad he's not around.  The service was beautiful.  The poem above is "Nothing Gold Can Stay" by Robert Frost.  I remember back to The Outsiders from the 80s as it was recited but it's always stuck with me throughout the years as one of my favorite Robert Frost Poems, too!

Peer Pressure Exists For Adults, too! Bento Box...Here I Come!

Yes...Peer Pressure exists for Adults, too!  A while back Opal blogged about Bento Boxes and I was intrigued!  I think for days (or even weeks) after reading her post I thought Bento Boxes were a 'special box'...but after doing some online research I found out it can be any box, really, because Bento Box literally means "Meal in a Box" or "Boxed Meal".  (I don't know WHY I assumed that - Opal didn't mention that it was a 'special box' in her post!  Eeeek!  Silly Me!)  To further the Peer Pressure I randomly stumbled upon a few bloggers who focus on Bento Box Blogging!  How Trendy!  I was hooked and I didn't even have one...YET!  The only thing is since I don't have kids I don't think I would do the super creative CUTE and FUN looking ones that I have seen online thus far.  Instead my REAL reason for caving is because I tend to bring leftovers or a dish I made the night before for my lunch the next day but I want to focus on incorporating more foods for a compete meal...and not just eating a whole bowl of one thing, I guess.  Call it a mini goal if you will! 

Well, this past weekend I was able to locate a great deal on a Bento Box of sorts that would fit my needs.  I didn't want to spend a lot of money on one until I knew more about them and wanted to see if I would use it as much as I hope.  I ended up finding TWO of the kits along with an insulated bag/carrier for about $30.  Most of the ones I saw online were $30 for 1 of them and with less compartments.  I figured IF I really got into it - I could always buy another one...a more involved one, you know!?  So here is what the first one looks like!  Along with my very first assembled Bento Box attempt!  Woot!  Starting at the top you will see 1/2 of a Tomato - diced, with Hemp Hearts/Hemp Seeds sprinkled on top.  They are marinating in Balsamic Vinegar as well.  To the right...simple Mandarin Oranges...the large container - at the top as a section of sandwich spread LEFTOVERS I made (more on that later today or tomorrow), below that is small triangles of Whole Grain Pita Bread, then in the center is leftover Pinjur that I finally finished, more triangles, and leftover rice towards the bottom.  You may also see 4 small Apple Cinnamon "chips" in each corner leftover from my dehydrating attempts.  Then on the other side is Corn that I added just a little bit of Basil Pesto Grapeseed Oil to with Cashews outlining the top.  It was interesting because the moisture from the corn was soaked up by the cashews and they tasted wonderful!

I think this may have been RubberMaid Brand and if it wasn't it was a close knock-off of the brand.  I also bought a salad kit one that I will most likely be blogging about tomorrow or the next day!  Also as a mini goal I hope to blog about my adventures with Bento Boxes and Meal Portions often so you will probably see a lot more of these types of posts.  Another thing I like about this set I bought is that the little compartments snap into place.  It also fits nicely into this insulated bag carrier I found in the same row at the store.  NOT Pictured here but included in each set is a freezer pack that snaps to the bottom (or top).  As you can see in this photo there is plenty of room left over for additional items in the bag!  This made me happy because I have been struggling with remembering to eat breakfast and I think I can account for that, too!  So far I am very happy with this purchase as well as my first attempt!

Here you can see my Oatmeal packets (I just add water) and fruit cups.  I know store bought isn't the best - fresh is - but I had them and am trying to use them and not waste them plus they are good in a pinch!

Apparently I had an insanely productive weekend because I have about 5 other things to post but I think I will wait until tomorrow!

Be sure to keep scrolling because I have a few other posts that might be of interest, today!  Question of the Day...what are some of your favorite Adult "Brown Bag" or "Bento Lunches" for the office and/or workplace?